VERY RANDOM THOUGHTS....

These thoughts come to me while i am undergoing Ayurveda treatment  for scoliosis at Calicut... 

Life is so fast and mechanical these days...never did i think i will become a typical city dweller. A typical working day doesn't give me enough time to spend on myself,my family or my pets...This is a comparatively laid back and chilled out city of Kochi!!! There is so much I wanted and want to to do, but then there is so much that I  have to do. It seems to me that there is so little time left for all that I want to achieve and enjoy. Its like being in a race without a finishing line, so there are really no winners. I also know that my life is more balanced than many of my friends, colleagues etc, but then still there is so much I feel that I miss out on...

There are so many things I wanna learn... I keep thinking that I will do this, learn that...never works out...Heck I haven't been able to manage even a drivers' license till now( i know thats pathetic). Yeah i know, may be i just don't know how to manage my time, or may be I cant prioritise... but then thats just me. Again i end up telling myself, you cannot have everything in life!!

Am  not exactly a career woman, I value family more than a career, but then I do not want to depend on anyone either. So there is the need to work... and then I can't do work for the sake of it...It should be meaningful and something of value... Since I have fortunately found a job and an organisation to my liking, I cannot help being committed and sincere to it...thus my work is always lingering at the back of my mind, even when I am with my friends or family...thinking of ways to better the reach, the effectiveness etc...

Sometimes I do feel like letting go of everything and just focussing on what I want to do...but just a second later reality strikes and am back on track!! There are something you need to let go in order to have a 'normal' life i guess! By normal I mean which is accepted and recognised as normal by contemporary society...which is again relative...anyways discussing that right now would be too philosophical and unwarranted too.

I guess thats all for today..am not supposed to sit for long....need to go now!