Sorrow of being...

I should be happy but I am sad
Mad., mad at the world around
Mad at me

I want to fly
High, touch the sky
Pulled down by
Myself I cry

Cry, cry for what?
The lose of love?
Love the way I want it
Not the way you think
The way I want it

Cry, cry for what,
The lose of time
Time of fun and joy
Not as you think it
The way I want it

May be yes,
I am petty, I am crazy
I know am not nice
But I am me

I should be me


I should be happy but I am sad
Mad., mad at the world around
Mad at me

No Rhyme No Reason

No rhyme no reason

Why I

Am with you

The pain I feel

Drives me closer to you

I realise that now

The days pass by

The fights, abuses and all

But I come back

How long,

Will go on this ?

No rhyme no reason

Why I

Am with you

The feelings the same

But something’s changed

The joy’s gone,

More of a hollow within

I loathe looking at you

But I can’t leave you

How long

Will go on this?

No rhyme no reason

Why I

Am with you

Yes, I love you still

But something’s changed

More of make believe

The thought of your touch

I shudder with fear

How long

Will go on this

No rhyme no reason

Why I

Am with you

Death.. Unknown but Certain

The thought of death has been coming to my mind a lot lately. The moment we are conceived, the one thing that is certain is death.Whether we are rich, poor, noble or evil... death will conquer us all. It erases all traces of individuality and our life. It is like a never ending battle as Death strikes at Life... But Life is renewed and rejuvenated at each fall. Death is as mysterious as it is certain. Thus we have Religion and Spirituality to seek answers from. The Truth though will come only when it strikes and the experience nobody never get to share with anyone.



Death,definite from birth
Nothing else is so..
You and Me
This moment we may seize
Next moment we may cease
Life is so...
Only Death is so...

Virgins? Angels?
The Lord?
You and Me
The promise of alluring
The free Life of afterlife
Who knows, not I!
Life is so...
Only Death is so...

Poor , Rich
Good, Evil
You and Me
Just Dust and Bones..
The soul?
Is it there or where?
Life is so... uncertain
Only Death is so...certain

Heaven of Freedom

Today 26th January 2011, I would like to quote the words of Rabindranath Tagore about his vision of India...But I think his words are also relevant to the whole world.


"Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high;
Where knowledge is free;
Where the world has not been broken up
into fragments by narrow domestic walls;
Where words come out from the depth of truth;
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection;
Where the clear stream of reason
has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead habit;
Where the mind is led forward by thee into ever-widening thought and action---
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake."

I still hold on...

It makes me go crazy

The Past

But I never let others know

Still holding on to the grudges,

The mistakes,

Forgiveness, doesn't come

Naturally to me

I still hold on,

Even though, its all gone

The spitefulness within,

Burns more fiercely,

My thoughts hurt me more and more

The lids closed though and

the tumult within

Unknown to the ones I love

Respite I find through words and colours

But I still hold on

Even though, its all gone

Dark Secrets,

Deep Regrets

Somethings, never to be shared

Never to be let out

To the grave they will go

With me and me alone

A Pandora's Box,

But I still hold on

Even though, its all gone

Happy to Just be!

I am Happy to just be...
Without a Care in the world,
I sing, dance and speak
My mind
The Ultimate Freedom
Is what I Seek...
Not be pulled down by the Mundane
The Rigid and the Narrow
Try as they may

Nothing to Prove
Nothing to Exhibit
With Freedom
I blossom like the lilies in the pond
Like
a naughty cool breeze in summer,
the warmth of the winter sun,
I love to be...Just be...
Happy to Just be!!

A Play: Life

Life is but a play!

The world's an arena on display

Everyone's for the limelight, the glitter

We scheme, we cheat, we act!

Masks Masks everywhere

Lies lies everywhere,

Different types of lies!!!

What is real, what is true... unknown

What is favourable, we deem it the truth

Everyone's truth is different and flexible

We scheme, we cheat, we act!

Masks Masks everywhere

Lies lies everywhere

Different types of lies!!!

Painted faces, dazzling dresses,and oh what fashion!

Cover up, cover up the ugliness within,

And make us the envy of others!!

We scheme, we cheat, we act!

Masks masks everywhere

Lies lies everywhere

Different types of lies!!!

One wrong act! One true step!

And off you go, the stage is no longer for you!

Only the careful and cunning succeed

We scheme, we cheat, we act!

Masks masks everywhere

Lies lies everywhere

Different types of lies!!!

To survive, join the game quick,

Learn the tricks and the bricks of the trade

Learn to dodge and to play!!

We scheme, we cheat, we act!

Masks masks everywhere

Lies lies everywhere

Different types of lies!!!

Places and fond memories!!

Being an army officer's daughter, we had to travel a lot. Sometimes within a year, six months or even within two months!! As a result I have been to 14 different schools from lower kindergarten onwards till the XIIth Standard. Sometimes used to find it quite tough, moving on, leaving friends!!! But then the thrill of shifting to a new place, meeting new people, making new friends also was there. Each place has given new experiences and learning, some fond memories, some sad moments and really great friends!! Every city, town or village has something unique to it and something endearing. Either the people there, the climate, the teachers, friends, the freedom or some other factor which makes it unforgettable and memorable. After the initial adjustment issues, I always got emotionally attached to the place, only to move again. May be that is the reason that I don't have the particular attachment to any place. Home is where I am, where my family is. Whichever be that city, town or village.

Reflections

There is so much we all want from life

More than just the simple pleasures of life

We desire

Content!! Satisfied!!?

Is there anyone who is?

The desires are always for something we don’t have

Or which is elusive…

We call it ambition, determination to succeed or whatever…

But at times,

I think its just simple Greed

Our dignity, self respect

Our emotions

Principles and Morals

All sacrificed in the name of

Ambition

Success

Power

We trample on others,

We pull them down

We ridicule others

In the name of competition

In the name of business

In the name of economics!!

Ethics

It is a subject

Just that

Which is mugged up

And forgotten

‘It’s just not practical’

Is the common refrain!

Buying Happiness, is possible

Never

When do we learn that though…

That all we pursue is

But shallow, temporary and useless

Peace of mind, body and soul

Is the most important of all

I guess

Not till its too late…..

Too late to undo whats done..

Bright sunny meadows...

fragrance of fresh hay and flowers

Amalgamate and bring forth haunting memories

Of the childhood past...adolescence lost

The Age of innocence and freedom

simplicity and fun....

The splendour of the sunset 

reminds of the playful abandon and careless joy

Nothing to regret, nothing to contemplate

Living in the moment

Of pure ecstasy, grief or anger

And move on as well

The brilliance of the past is long gone....

The future is doubtful...

The present looks bleak...dark and deep...

Lets for one moment

Be happy as we are now

At this moment...

Forget the world and Just BE...

Crossroads...

I stand here wondering which

Path to take

The paths which are yet to be made…

The paths already traced out in front

Where will they take me

What dangers and hurdles lie in front

I know not

Only the courage and spirit of life

Takes me ahead

But still I am in a dilemma

Knowing that it doesn’t matter, whatever

Has to happen will

But still the mind wonders and wonders on

The confusion clouds the mind

And renders logic and reason helpless

As I stand wondering here which path to take in life

Well there is always a tendency in me to complicate my life... I think I am very good at it...may be no one can do it like me...

Just cannot let life be as it is,

Always the search for more,

better, and even more...

The Quest, almost always lands me

in a quagmire, the solution to which

Involves that which am terrible at ;

Deciding

between something desirable, lovable, 

unnatainable, unreasonable or un

Importance of anyone, questioned, cannot be

I procrastinate, delay and try to circumvent

And then comes a point where finally life takes a decision!!!

And tries to attain the equilibrium that 

I always tend to destroy....

I know it 

Curious Kitten

A cute little kitten
Curious and Oh so naughty!
Everywhere pokes around
Wonder of wonders awaits its
Big green eyes
At every nook and corner
Hops and jumps,
Chases and stalks
The novel,the unknown is sought for,
The known, the familiar is boring and abandoned,

The playful search, when
Will it end
A pursuit so fascinating,
challenging
Would there be?
To hold forever the attention of
The naughty kitten